Narcissism, Psychopathy, Chakras and Astrology – phew!

Here’s an interview I did with astrologer, numerologist and reiki healer Walter Boyd of Rainbow Path to Wholeness .  Walter had started a fascinating thread on Facebook about his observations of what was going on in the chakras of psychopaths he saw in a TV documentary.  So I wanted to explore that more with him.

The discussion evolved into one about astrology and I have to say that I feel like I understand the benefits of astrology so much more thanks to Walter’s clear explanation.  His deep knowledge of the subject shines through.

Surprisingly, this was Walter’s first video and he was nervous about doing it.  You wouldn’t know from watching it!  But since I used to be a GCSE Japanese teacher,  I had to calm down stressed out teenagers when they were doing their speaking exams, so I’m quite used to recording nervous people and getting the best out of them!  Who knew doing Japanese speaking exams would give such valuable experience later!!

This is a fairly long video (35mins) so grab a cuppa, relax and enjoy it!  🙂

Trust In Yourself

Trust in…

  • your emotions
  • your body
  • your heart
  • your soul
  • your intuition
  • your spiritual gifts and abilities
  • your ability to change your thoughts
  • your ability to learn
  • your ability to set boundaries
  • your bullshit detector
  • your ability to heal the past
  • life’s wisdom
  • what life brings you
  • the idea of life happening for you
  • your ability to change the unconscious programmes running your life
  • your ability to ask for help from the right people
  • your ability to find the perfect people to help you with everything you need
  • your ability to discern who to trust and who not to trust
  • your life experiences as valuable lessons and insights to others
  • your ability to inspire others with your truth
  • your wildest, craziest dreams and visions

Trust in yourself, beautiful soul.  Trust in yourself.   <3

To help you do this, Yoga Teacher Lesley Wilson and I have created a gorgeous workshop called “Loving and Trusting Yourself Again”.  You can see the details here if you feel called to join us <3

Are You Crazy Enough To Think You Can Change The World?

Here’s to the crazy ones.
The misfits.
The rebels.
The troublemakers.
The round pegs in the square holes.
The ones who see things differently.
They’re not fond of rules.
And they have no respect for the status quo.
You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them.
About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them.
Because they change things.
They push the human race forward.
While some see them as the crazy ones, we see genius.
Because the people who are crazy enough to think
they can change the world, are the ones who do.
-Steve Jobs

Gifts From Murky Depths of The Water Element

What if envy had a vital message?  What if all of the darker emotions had vital messages for us?  What if being true to yourself means honouring all of the emotions?

The idea of the 4 Elements appears in many traditions and cultures.  The Kabbalah, Astrology, The Tarot, Native American wisdom – all of these use the idea that we’re made up of the 4 basic elements of earth, water, air and fire.  These 4 elements correspond to different part of our human selves:

Earth – the physical body

Water – the emotions

Air – thoughts and beliefs, the intellect

Fire – our creativity, imagination, intuition and the spiritual self

Having total wellbeing means that all 4 elements are working in harmony with each other and are balanced.  The problem we have in western societies is that the air element tends to overpower all the others.  In many education systems, intellectual achievement is valued over everything else.  Wiser schools and colleges know that creativity (fire), movement in the physical body (earth) and emotional intelligence (water) are just as vital to our overall intelligence as pure academic enquiry is.

The darker emotions (water) like envy, anger, fear and shame are only darker because we rarely bring them into the light of awareness.  But when we take the time to listen to their messages, they can give us invaluable insights to navigate whatever we’re facing and find the truth of it.  The deeper truth is always healing.

Whenever I feel one of the darker emotions come up, my first place to look it up  is Karla McLaren’s excellent book “The Language of Emotions”.  Emotions originate in the lower parts of the brain – the limbic system and they are responses to our environment – both the external environment (around our physical bodies) and in response to our internal beliefs and thoughts.  When we get the higher parts of the brain that deal with thinking to connect up with and work with the lower parts of the brain, we get more control over our state and can move through problems and issues with more ease.  Life is richer and fuller.  This is air and water working together.

But when the thinking part of the brain is cut off from the emotions, we can buy into collective thinking and ideas that stunt our own development and keep us small.  For example, the idea that emotions are primitive and dumb and should never be on show became a collective belief about emotions.   Living from this intellect-centred view shuts off a vital part of ourselves that brings integrity to our whole systems.  We have the evidence of what a lack of emotion does to us – humans can commit unspeakable acts of violence and cruelty when there is no regulation from emotions, such as in the case of some psychopaths, sociopaths and extreme narcissists.  But those who feel emotions richly are often the great healers and compassionate, visionary contributors to society.

I noticed my own envy coming up about other people’s business successes.  Karla differentiates between jealousy and envy.  She says that jealousy is about unfaithfulness or deceit in close relationships whereas envy is about “unfair distribution of resources or recognition”.  Boy, oh boy does that resonate for me!  “Why do all these other business owners get to have thriving businesses (i.e. good income) and recognition when I’m struggling?”  The clue to answering this question my mind invented is in Karla’s empathic practice for dealing with envy:

Discern whether you’re responding to disloyalty and unfairness in others or to your own lack of self-regard and worthiness.  In either case, restore your boundaries first; then listen to your intuition and honor the anger and fear inside…envy.

The Language of Emotions, p.263

What an insight!  My envy is really about my own lack of self- regard and worthiness and it’s OK to feel that and to acknowledge it.  The inner work is to dive into it and see what guidance my intuition has on what my next step is.  Karla has another gem of an explanation of diving into envy:

When your envy is welcomed and channelled honorably, it will help you uncover unhealed issues and traumas that continue to haunt your present-day behavior.  p.276

When I did deep dive into it, sure enough, there was a massive unhealed trauma and belief about being abandoned by important meant.  It was blocking the flow of masculine energy in me and now it’s healed, the flow has restored.  I’ll share more about this on a Facebook live because there are useful insights for everyone on the spiritual path.

By taking the time to stop, listen in and honour the insights that envy brought me, my energetic system is flowing better leaving me with better wellbeing in the present.  All the answers we really need are inside.  I call this inner healing wisdom our soul’s song.  We just need to get still and quiet enough to listen to its message and let it work its magic.


I’m creating a programme to help balance out the 4 elements and listen to the soul song.  I’ll do both an online course-based and a 1-1 session based version of the course.  If you’d be interested in being a beta tester for either version at a reduced rate, please do get in contact by FB message or email

Here’s to embracing ALL of the emotions and letting the water element live fully in our lives.  <3

Do  you know your soul? 

Do you know anger?

Do you know sadness?

Do you know fear? 

Do you know your fears? 

Do you know your hopes?

Do you know joy?

Do you know peace?

Do you know shame?

Do you know rage?

Do you know hurt?

Do you know heartbreak?

Do you know grief?

Do you know your heart’s deepest desires?

Do you know what makes your heart sing? 

Do you know how your soul speaks? 

Do you know the truth of who you are?

The Power Of What You Used To Fear

It’s funny how the things you feared years ago can become an integral part of your life and purpose.  Angels and past lives were 2 such things for me and yet now I’m using them to help people feel much better, heal from the past and resolve burning problems.

Is there something you’ve feared in the past that you do quite happily now?  Or is there something you fear now that could be a skill or valuable insight in the future?  This quote by Marianne Williamson sums up the reason for these kinds of fears:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”  Marianne Williamson

Fear of Seeing Angels

When I was still recovering from my mental breakdown, my mum gave me a book on angels by Diana Cooper.  I loved the idea of them, but the thought of actually seeing one scared the bejesus out of me!  Now, I’m merrily doing Doreen Virtue’s Angel Intuitive course and fully embracing the connection with angels.  Although, I have to admit – I don’t actually “see” angels in the way I feared I might then, it’s more a knowing and a feeling that their energy is around.  And it’s far from scary 🙂

Fear of Seeing Past Lives 

The same was true of hearing about past lives for the first time.  I loved the Celestine Prophecy and bought the experiential guide that goes with it to dive deeper into the ideas in it.  But when I read the follow up book, “The Tenth Insight” and it started talking about past lives … ooh, fear alert…fear alert! AND there was an experiential guide for the Tenth Insight too – I thought “eek… there must be something in this!  Help – my version of reality is crumbling!!!”  Yeah, there was a lot of fear about that but also a lot of curiosity too.

Fast forward a few years and I quite happily took a course of past life regression therapy, did a course in it and do it with clients now too.  I have to admit, my mum was the first person I practiced past life regression hypnotherapy on and it  did freak me out because she became a child describing a lady on a ducking stool.  There was that moment of “oh crap – what if I can’t bring her back and she’s stuck like that?!”  But fortunately the unconscious mind is wiser than our fears.  She came back to normal consciousness with no problems and with a vivid memory of the past life she saw.

Is it all real?  Does is matter?

Past life regression, Angels – these are function of the unconscious mind.  Yes, I do think they are figments of the imagination but I also think they’re functions of the imagination.  Are they real?  Well, they might be, they might not be – it’s a matter of personal belief.  But what I do know is that belief is a powerful thing and using these techniques helps people to feel better and that’s the most important thing.  <3

If you’d like to have a go at connecting with your angels to experience their energy and support for yourself, I’m running a one day workshop on June 24th in Chandlers Ford, Hampshire.  We’ll explore ways to connect and how to receive messages as well as connecting with the Inner Child too.  It’ll be a day of nurture and self-care as you relax into the arms of the angels.  Details are here:

I would absolutely love to welcome you along!

Love Jacqui xxx


Connecting With The Inner Child

November 2008, on a psychic development workshop right by Mount Fuji, I set the intention to do Inner Child Healing.  After I said my intention out loud, my teacher saw an angel carrying a child flow right through my body.  And what a ride it’s been since then!

When you set powerful intentions like that, you get everything you need to make it happen.  Inner Child Healing is a beautiful, gentle and yet powerful way to reconnect with your true self.  And what we’re really doing is simply listening to the Inner Child’s needs and meeting them.  They’re usually very simple needs like space to be creative, to be heard, to play or have fun.  Children live in the moment and can be great spiritual teachers and the same goes for your Inner Child.  They may be small but they are equally as wise as any adult and a great ally in bringing about a greater sense of wellbeing and happiness.

My Inner Child Healing training has come from a combination of taking courses, studying and mostly the life experiences that have come.  In particular, working in nurseries has meant that I’ve worked with some of the best childcare practitioners in the area to see how they get the best out of children.

The way I work with the Inner Child is to make sure my client feels relaxed and at ease, then go into a theta state where we can access the unconscious mind and spiritual guidance, and then I “see” or “sense” the client’s Inner Child.  S/he will communicate with me and I interact with him or her like a nursery practitioner – reassuringly,  asking questions and encouraging creativity.  The creative solutions that the Inner Child can come up with are incredible sometimes – e.g. turning a narcissistic spouse into an octopus and safely putting them in a tank of water to stop them putting their “energy tentacles” into the client!

So it’s not so much that Inner Child gets healing, it’s that s/he helps with what the client needs healing and my job is to hold a safe space, listen and encourage the child’s creativity.  Adding Angels to work with the Inner Child adds an extra layer of love, safety and gentle power to the healing work.

If you’d like to learn how to connect with and use the healing wisdom of your Inner Child and Angels, I’m running a one-day workshop at The Mantra Rooms in Chandlers Ford on 24th June.  The event details are here:

Early bird tickets of just £33 (plus Eventbrite fees) are available until the end of May.  Usual ticket price is £44 (plus fees).

8 Ways to Set Boundaries To Protect Yourself From Manipulative People

In my last blog post, I posted 8 signs you’re being manipulated and said that I would write a post on how to set stronger boundaries.  Here are 8 ways to do that and suggestions on ways to help you do them.

  1. Trust, trust, trust your intuition and your heart over your head.  Trust your gut feelings and knowing.  They’re always right.  I have a meditation to help you practice connecting with your heart here .  The more you connect with your heart and soul, the more you can connect with your intuition and listen to your gut feelings.
  2. Get to know your own emotions so that you recognise which are yours and which belong to someone else.  If you’re sensitive, you’ll pick up on other people’s emotions.  Your emotions (particularly the ones from your heart and soul) have a very different feel from other people’s.  Insecure people may put up a front of being confident and in control, but they project their own feelings of insecurity onto you to manipulate your feelings and hide their own insecurities.  Foreign emotions in your body and energy can’t flow and you can never get to the true message they are trying to convey.  Healthy anger alerts you to when someone is violating your boundary and is telling you to take action to protect yourself.  (Anger in its healthy, flowing form is assertiveness.  Unhealthy anger is uncomfortable and often uncontrollable.)  Karla McLaren has fantastic explanations of each of the emotions and here is her fantastic explanation of anger.
  3. Notice when guilt arises and disengage from the conversation.  Guilt is a social weapon of choice against, caring, sensitive, empathic types like you and me.  You start feeling guilty because of their problems when there is very little you can do to solve anyone’s problems, let alone theirs.  Sharing problems in a safe space with people who allow each other to be vulnerable safely is entirely different from one-sided sharing of problems that cuts off vulnerability and authenticity.  The latter kind of problem sharing will inevitably make you feel guilty, never good enough and like you’re the cause of the person’s problem.  Someone who shuns responsibility for their problems and instead blames others for them cannot be helped until they take ownership of their own problems.  If you notice the guilt arising, politely remove yourself from the conversation.  Do step 5 to make sure their energy is gone from your system.
  4. Beware of “poor me” games.  Often you will notice guilt arising too but it’s useful to spot the onset of the “poor me” game before you notice guilt.  In the Celestine Prophecy, we’re introduced to the idea of control dramas, which are ways of controlling other people to get energy flowing to us.  The antidote, according to the book, is to have such a strong connection to source energy that you can bring the underlying control into the light of awareness and the drama stops.  With a regular person, this may be the case, but with a particularly manipulative or controlling person like a narcissist, you’re not dealing with the same constitution and this just won’t work unless you are at Jesus/Buddha/enlightened master level of consciousness.  The “Poor me” drama (and the other control drama patterns of aloof, intimidator and interrogator) is used simply to manipulate you into giving your time, attention and energy to their needs.   They are taking advantage of your caring nature for their own ends and don’t care about you.  That can sound harsh, but these are people who simply function differently from the other 99% or so of the population.  Once you notice a “poor me” game in progress, keep your energy inside your energy boundary and politely withdraw from the conversation.   Do step number 5 to make sure there’s no energy residue.
  5. Break the energetic connection between you.  You can visualise removing their energy from your body and aura and turning it into an object or shape, and then image giving that object or shape to the guardian angel of the manipulator.  There is no need for you to heal this energy yourself and it’s not your responsibility.  Another way to break the energy is to visualise Archangel Michael being with you and asking him to use his sword to cut the energy.  Then witness as he powerfully and safely brings his sword down to sever the energy cords.
  6. Value YOUR needs.  Get in touch with what it is that you need and do whatever you need to to get your needs met.  This makes your energy far stronger and more resilient to any challenges in life.  If you’re not used to listening to your needs, go gently and practice tuning into what you need moment by moment.  Maybe you need more fun, creative time, maybe you need better nutrition, maybe you need to journal to connect with your feelings.  Only you can know what you truly need. <3
  7. Limit your time with manipulative people as much as you can.  Some people cannot be changed and it’s best to withdraw and limit time around them.  You can send them love from afar but unless you’re a spiritual master, you’re unlikely to be able to stay centred and balanced around them.
  8. Cleanse yourself with your preferred method of energy clearing.  Examples of this are: salt baths, pure incense, crystals for energy clearing (such as clear quartz that you’ve programmed, citrine, amethyst or any crystal that you intuitively sense will help you), high frequency tuning forks such as those by Suara Sound, reiki or some other form of energy healing.  Keep your vibration high and you’ll be more strongly connected to your true self.  And who you truly are can never be manipulated by anyone <3

These are just 8 suggestions.  If you have any more tips and suggestions, do add them in the comments below.  The more resources we have to share on dealing with manipulation, the more we can limit its power over us.  The patterns of fear, control and manipulation that keep us small are gradually dissolving away and the more we can set strong boundaries and walk away, the more these patterns can be left firmly in humanity’s past.

With love 

Jacqui xxx

By the way, if the manipulative person is one of your parents, my healing from toxic parents programme is for you.  It’s designed for those who had a toxic parent such as a narcissist and who are more spiritually minded.  It will help you release yourself through deep forgiveness and give your inner child what s/he has always needed.

Details are here: Spiritual Healing From Toxic Parents Programme


8 Signs You’re Being Manipulated

One of our most ugly ways of communicating with each other is through manipulation.  Instead of owning our vulnerabilities and coming from the heart, we go into our heads and try to make others feel bad for our own insecurities.  Now I have to hold my hand up and say I’ve used this on others and am in the learning process of eliminating it from my communication.  But there’s a big difference between using controlling communication from time to time and doing it all the time.  All of us can get fearful and lapse into trying to control but often we’ll notice it, stop ourselves and make changes.  But for some people, it’s become such a deeply ingrained habit that this is the only way they know how to communicate.  It can also be a form of abuse.

Here are some of the signs of being manipulated:

  1. You feel like you have to walk on eggshells
  2. You feel you have to choose your words very carefully to avoid upset
  3. You may feel pain or uncomfortable emotion in your body
  4. You feel a need to justify your actions
  5. You feel guilty
  6. You’re criticised for doing things you like to do
  7. You’re made to feel like you’re responsible for someone else’s pain
  8. You’re lied to

If you recognise any of these signs in someone around you now, it’s a good idea to create stronger boundaries and increase your protection.  If this is how you are being treated daily by anybody, I want you to know that this is absolutely NOT OK and you deserve much, much better.  You deserve to be treated with love, respect, honesty and openness.

I created a blog post on boundaries and protection here.

There is a chance that the person manipulating you is a narcissist.  You can see details of my programme for healing after narcissistic abuse here and just reading this may help you understand your situation better and realise some changes you can make.

Wishing you all the love and kindness you truly deserve.

Jacqui xxx