Little Victories for Living Consciously

How much do you live consciously?  Are you aware of what thoughts, emotions and sensations become present as you experience life?  As you may well be aware, the more we can get conscious of our responses, the more control we have over them and the better we can make our lives.  When we see what’s going on, we can notice when things need changing or healing and take action to sort them out.  Likewise, it means we can notice little victories that show our consciousness is shifting for the better.  In this post, I’d like to share with you a little conscious victory I had.

As I posted about previously, I’ve been going deeply into my money story this year to improve my relationship with my finances.  In coaching and healing, you soon learn that nothing is as it seems. Our relationship with our finances is rarely just about money – it’s fascinating what else in our minds is tied up in our money story.

One of my hobbies that I’m just getting back into, is playing the bagpipes. I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with them and it dawned on me that there were crucial insights and lessons related to money and my business.

When I was in primary school (elementary school), I started playing the bagpipes. I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with the bagpipes since that time.  It was all unconscious so I had no idea what emotions were going on.  The biggest problem for me was that I’ve also been a chronic people pleaser for most of my life and the bagpipes are very much an instrument that divides opinion.  Some people absolutely love them and some people absolutely hate them.  As a people pleaser, the latter used to be really hard for me, so I would minimise my impact as much as possible to avoid upsetting people.  It didn’t feel safe to have others’ disapproval even though I would get a lot of admiration too.

Now, how this links with my money story is that I used to earn quite a bit of money from playing the bagpipes in Southern England.  Bagpipers are rare in the South and people who want a bagpiper for a wedding or New Year’s Eve will pay quite a lot of money.  I also used to get days off school playing on the QE2 cruise ship before it set sail from Southampton and would get some money for doing that, too.

So, that was the background to the unconscious “stuff” going on.  Back to my little victory.  I offered to play the bagpipes at the special needs school I’m working at.  I took them in having done little practice (so knowing they wouldn’t sound as good as I can make them) and played in a music lesson.  Special needs kids don’t do people pleasing – they will give you the reaction straight!  Most of the young people in the class enjoyed or became interested in the bagpipes, but one balled her eyes out!  This was the victory.  For the first time, I really felt it was OK that she didn’t like it.  I didn’t feel guilty that I’d upset her like I would have done before.  It might seem like a small shift and an obvious point for many, but for me it’s the fruit of many years of hard work to change my responses to situations in empowering ways.

I think I just might go ahead and practise more so I can offer my services for weddings and New Year. 🙂

Are you a people-pleaser?  Have you had any consciousness shifting victories lately?  How have you managed to make the shifts?  I’d love to hear!

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